My children have now mostly grown up and are starting to go on adventures of their own in search of starting their life adventures. I have loved every second of being a Dad and I was one of those Dad’s that would do anything for his kids. In theory, I was more of a Mom role then a Dad role with them growing up because I was the caring and compassionate one in the relationship. Even to this day when my kids are 14 and 17, they are still my world.
Many years later after a failed 13 year marriage, I found my true soul mate in My kitten. We have been married for going on three years and in a D/s dynamic 24/7. I am happier then ever but then it got even better about 6 months ago. My submissive/wife found a little space that I can honestly say was always there but we weren’t able to give it a name.
One thing that always intrigued me about kitten is that she would act exactly like one. She would cuddle me, head bump me and paw at me at every chance she had. She would talk in a little voice at times when asking for things or if she wanted to do something. At the beginning I just thought it was a cute thing that I adored but it has blossomed into something a lot more then that now.
As soon as we started our journey into D/s we released that I could give her true kitten play time which was fun and exciting. The ability to be the animal persona that you have always been but with strictness and intent. This was amazing for both of us and if we had more time, kitten would be able to come out in pet play a lot more but that isn’t the reality of our busy lives. It takes planning out blocks of time to do kitten play and that is hard for us.
And now we come to the part that is the title of the blog. 🙂 I think the lack of time for kitten play may have jump started the ‘little’ persona in kitten and made it grow a lot quicker. We also have a friend in the UK who is little space 24/7 when she is talking to me and once her and kitten starting talking I noticed that kitten was taking on a lot of the same qualities. Looking back, I can’t remember if it was kitten or I that really noticed it but the little space moments didn’t last long at the beginning as it was very hard for kitten to give up the adult brain.
Once it was recognized and labeled, kitten was determined to learn to enjoy this new found sense of freedom from adult reality. Over the next few months it started with coloring books and children’s movies which worked well. Then it was PJ’s, sippy cups, stuffies, lego, play-dough and children’s stories. Finally we have evolved the little space into onesies and pacifiers. Most nights after work involve some heavy little space time where she is told to put on outfits or grab her sippy cup and paci. She immediately goes into little space and stays there till after we are asleep.
Little space is usually associated with triggers. I have the ability to put her into little space and also pull her out of it. Now, putting her into little space can be done at any time but pulling her out of it is a LOT harder and confusing to her if it isn’t done right. The first trigger i have is names and this is a powerful one. When in little space she is My “pumpkin” but in adult space she is my “kitten”. Other more confusing triggers involve things like allowing her to check her phone and then she sees business stuff pop up and BAM, she is out of little space and has almost withdrawal symptoms. So, if I want to keep her in one type of headspace then I really need to pre-plan for everything.
Now, from a Daddy Dom perspective, what are some of the pros and cons of being a Daddy Dom? Let me list some below and we will chat about each one in a bit more detail:
- kitten gets to free her head
- This is a bonus for kitten and Myself. kitten is a tightly wound individual at most times that takes on a lot of stress which can manifest into frustrating moments over smaller things during the day. These smaller moments of frustration can be very stressful for those around her as she is focal. I feel that the little space has helped reduce down her life stress and has made those frustrating moments less intense and frequent. Therefore my stress is reduced too.
- I get to be a Daddy again
- The feeling that I get when I am being relied on and requested for even the small things is invigorating. Brushing kitten’s hair in the morning, reading a bed time story, filling up her sippy cup MANY times a night, or carrying for boo-boo’s are things I used to live for when my kids were little. Being able to come home with my adult kitten and then instantly get her into little space is amazing. The Daddy part of Me loves little space.
- Non-sexual little space
- This is the single biggest hurdle that I have had to get over in the little space and I didn’t want to bury it at the bottom so we will talk about it now. kitten is a non-sexual little and even the conversations have to be non-sexual or I get a cute scowl from her. As a VERY sexual Dominant, this means less sexy time as little space is a big part of her home time now. What I have learned to do in this situation is multi leveled. If I want a sexual scene or sexual contact then I will not get her into little space when we get home by telling her that I want my kitten tonight. This is a way to let her know that the night will have sexy stuff in it. If she falls into little space naturally then I can pull her out by using her “kitten” name to ensure she doesn’t slide into her little brain. But in the end, I have less sexual release since kitten has found her little persona. I substitute it for more masturbation and better pre-planning for sexually frustrating times. In giving up some sexual release, I get a lot of other attention that my body craves like being a Daddy again.
- little days!
- This is one side of the little time that I am going to take advantage of a lot more when the weather gets a little warmer. We agreed a few months ago that every single month we would plan at least one day where it was all about little. We would go do something exciting in public or in private which involved complete little space. Outfit wise involves pig tails and bows but since kitten is not into embarrassment, there are no paci’s or anything that would visually identify her as a little. This adds a whole new challenge to the Daddy Dom because you have to keep the adult brain turned off. In private it is easy but in public it is VERY hard. I think on our next outing, her cell phone will be taken away because it is too hard for her to remain in little space when work starts calling. We are working on this and i will update this blog or write a new one when it is all figured out.
I am sure there are more pros and cons but I am also sure that there will be either updates to this blog or I will write a new one as “Part 2” at some point. So we will sum up my overall thoughts about little space.
Little space is an amazing place that allows your submissive to be free from the adult world and reduce stress. One of the major things about submission to us has always been about passing off 100% of the control to the Dominant and reducing stress so little space to us is almost taking that to a deeper level. Complete reliance on your Dominant to take care of the submissive’s needs at all times. As things progress in our dynamic, I can see things making more sense and a normality to the things we do. As first things are hard, awkward, weird but as time goes on we start to learn from those things, refine them and enjoy them as “normal”. I wouldn’t give up little space for the world and can’t wait to continue to grow it.